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I'm sure this has a cool futuristic name,
but I call it the Stupid Hippie Toaster.

Take a pendulum. Allow it to swing 360 degrees. Put four
big fire jets on top, blasting randomly, and six big scimitar blades
on the bottom. Sprinkle hippies liberally beneath. Set in motion.
The fire jets tilt the pendulum over so far that flames blast the ground
a few feet from the those booze-soaked dreadlocks. Meanwhile the
scimitar blades swing just inches above those patchouli-sweating chests.

It's like Poe's The Pit and the Pendulum,
with the bonus feature of getting your head scorched off.


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©2006 by Philosopher